By Kim Brassor

One Voice Evolving

Trouble with 12-Step

I started down the genealogy rabbit hole the way so many people do — with curiosity, hope, and a faint ache I couldn’t quite name. I was trying to trace the shape of my lineage, wondering if there was anything within my white heritage that might help me understand who I am… and who I’m becoming.

Maybe there was a hidden story.
Maybe there was a thread of meaning waiting to be found.

So I clicked. And searched. And traced names seven generations back. I followed every leaf on the Ancestry.com tree, every hint, every document, every marriage certificate and census form. I discovered entire branches I never knew existed. People buried in places I’ve never been. Line after line of names. So many names.

And then?

I hit a wall.

Not because the trail ended — but because I did. My neurodivergent brain— beautiful and complex as it is — became overwhelmed. The sheer volume of data, the number of paths, the layers of records, and the absence of story left me exhausted. It was all data.
No detail.
No voice.
No soul.

All lineage. No life.

I knew where they were buried, but I had no idea what they lived for.

I Wasn’t Looking for Facts. I Was Looking for Meaning.

And here’s the thing: I don’t think I’m alone.

A growing number of us are waking up to the reality that factual ancestry doesn’t equal emotional legacy. That a family tree might chart your bloodline, but it won’t tell you what broke someone’s heart. It won’t explain the silence between generations. It won’t pass down the resilience that lives in the spaces between trauma and triumph.

That kind of knowledge?
It doesn’t show up on a census form.
It comes through voice. Through story. Through vulnerability. Through community.

The Risk of Data Without Soul

In a world saturated with AI-generated content, digital timelines, and algorithm-fed memories, we’re being sold a dangerous lie: that information is the same as intimacy.

It’s not.

• Information won’t tell you how your grandmother smelled when she hugged you after a long day.

• Information won’t show your kids how your voice cracked when you talked about your first heartbreak.

• Information won’t preserve the way you laugh when you feel safe.

Only you can do that.

What We’re Building at One Voice Evolving

We are reclaiming the sacred art of storytelling. The story you tell yourself is the one that harms or heals you. The story you tell others is yours to tell. It is part of the legacy you leave.

Not as spectacle. Not as performance.
But as offering.

Because what we don’t say becomes what the next generation will have to wonder about.
And healing should not always be a mystery.

Because Legacy Isn’t a Family Tree.

It’s a Voice You Leave Behind.

You are more than your ancestry report.
You are a living, breathing, becoming.

Let’s make sure that story — your story — doesn’t get lost beneath the noise.

With care and conviction,
—Kim

What’s Next

At One Voice Evolving, we believe that legacy isn’t defined by the records we inherit — it’s shaped by the stories we choose to tell and the courage it takes to live them out loud. Some stories remind us where we came from. Others call us forward — into a deeper, more courageous version of who we are becoming.

And that’s exactly what this next conversation invites us to explore.

In this powerful episode, Kim sits down with Rev. Erika Tubman, founder of the Tubman Travel Project — a modern-day network helping women access reproductive care safely across state lines. Drawing parallels to the Underground Railroad, Rev. Erika shares how her work began, the challenges of navigating post-Roe America, and how small acts of courage and organized care are transforming lives. Find it on YouTube HERE:

About Kim

These two spaces—One Voice Evolving and Trouble With 12-Step—are really one project with two doors. Same voice, same mission: to call out the systems that keep us small, silent, and stuck.

On One Voice Evolving, I take on family relationships, legacy, and the tangled lies of systemic racism that live in our bodies and our families. On Trouble With 12-Step, I shine the light on process addiction, recovery culture, and the ways dependency gets repackaged as discipline.

Different topics, same truth: the system is the problem.

We’re not here for resets—we’re here for full renovations. Rip out the lies, bulldoze the shame, rebuild on truth. And we’re doing it together, with no heroes required.